Updated: Mar 16
Many people have heard of "Emotional Intelligence" but understanding "Traumatic Intelligence" seems to elude people. The concept is similar but different. Where one denotes a person is stuck in a particular age relating to a traumatic event in their life, the other speaks to a person's emotional and mental health in relation to a traumatic event.
Have you ever known anyone who survived a traumatic brain injury, car accident, or another traumatic event? Ever notice how their mood was affected by the incident?
Although further exploration into this concept is needed, it has been my experience that the mood a person is in at the time of the incident gets stuck in a loop cycle. If let's say, someone was in an argument prior to a traumatic event, that argument will pop back up at random moments as if it is still very real to them. This can be particularly troubling for the people that love them, but it doesn't have to be permanent.
Past traumatic events tend to wreck havoc on trying to live in the moment for some people. It's difficult to release the emotional attachment to a traumatic experience. This can result in emotional and mental disturbances that affect not only the person suffering but also anyone that comes into contact with them.
Healing past traumas is never an easy subject to approach but as a person who has dealt with this subject on a very personal level, I just want to say that it's never too late to seek advice, and it doesn't have to come from a "shrink".
In today's society, where mental illness is so prevalent, individuals who do try to seek help are often met with a prescription instead of an actual way to help. The medications that are given out so freely for depression, anxiety, mood disorders, and many other mental health conditions do nothing but mask the symptoms. They are not a cure, a recovery method, or a tool to help bring balance back to the life of the individual. What the medication actually does, in a lot of cases, is create more harm than they do good. The side-effects of these drugs far exceed any benefit that they may give.
Complementary and Alternative therapies may actually be the answer to this problem. It has been my personal experience that the reason these traumas stick around is that the event actually causes a sort of severing of the soul. A part of the soul is unable to cope with the event and gets stuck there. This causes the individual to cycle through the situation over and over again, leading to a common mental health situation called post-traumatic stress disorder of PTSD. Many people think that only soldiers suffer from this disorder, and while it became more publicized in relation to troops returning from overseas deployments, it affects anyone who has suffered a traumatic experience in their lives that continues to trouble them.
There is HOPE for healing these events.
Energy healers, Reiki Masters, Shamans, Body-workers, or any other name for energy workers, are able to help realign missing piece of the soul and help to bring a person back to a balanced state. The realignment helps to heal the emotional attachment to the situation, and therefore, eliminate the cause of PTSD.
Mindfulness practices also help to bring a person into the here and now. It teaches people to let go of "unnecessary" and "troublesome" thoughts that do not immediately impact the present moment. But, it also helps by teaching that sometimes the responsibility people take for a certain action, is not theirs to take.
Often times, victims take the full brunt of responsibility for an action that they had no control over and this causes emotional destruction for them.
Mindfulness teaches that our responsibility is only for our thoughts, actions, and reactions. We have no control over how others act or react even if it is in relation to us.
I may say something that others find offensive, but I am not responsible for the fact that they got offended. Something in their life, that they had no control over, causes them to find my words offensive, but that has nothing to do with me.
Someone may something that I find hurtful, but it's not their responsibility to bare that I find it hurtful, it's my own, and then it's time to look at why I found it hurtful.
There are many teachings available to help a person heal from any situation that they deem to be traumatic. Even though it isn't always understood by other people why a situation had that effect on them, the trauma is still very real, and should never be criticized or looked at poorly.
That being said, there are individuals who "play" at being a victim because they seek attention, not because they have truly been victimized. Those who truly suffer hold it deep inside, they aren't likely to bring it up in random conversations unless it is necessary to do so. They don't want others to know what they have been through and often feel shame around the subject. Individuals who seek attention freely express the "trauma" they went through and tend to be eager to bring it up to anyone in hopes to play on sympathy.
Do not be fooled and turn a blind eye to those in your life who may truly need be in need of soul realignment.
Stay tuned for the next post in the series that will dive into more in-depth ways to help heal from past traumas.
Post your comments below, I would be happy to answer questions or respond to comments.